I’ve moved. Again.

13 10 2008

In my never-ending quest to find the best (and best-looking) blogging site out there, I’ve moved on to tumblr.com. The name’s staying the same, so just hit up creativepetrol.tumblr.com to find me. See you there. Or not. Whatever you wanna do, really.


Coolest. Web page. Ever.

23 09 2008

Man. This is just fucking awesome. Watch the full :45 of glorious web genius here.

I’m yours.

13 09 2008

Finally, after exactly 8 years of dating, I’m married. See you after I get back from San Fransisco, suckers.

I’m a Democrat.

11 09 2008

Well now, I suppose that probably encouraged most of my Republican friends to navigate themselves away from reading this post, eh? If not, then please take your seats. You’re likely in for a Grade-A Kinney rant that only happens once every few months (OK, days).

I, much like 99.9% of the American public, just can’t get away from election new these days. I hear folks calling Palin everything from “a golden, shining icon for women everywhere” to “a pig with lipstick on.” I hear Obama referred to as a voice for change and an arrogant jerk. I hear McCain called a maverick and a fogey. What I don’t hear is any sort of rational-sounding debate coming from either side.

And don’t get me wrong — the candidates may be talking about nothing but their stances on the economy, the war or hot topics like gun control and abortion. But we all know that the candidates have nothing to do with anything when it comes to American politics. It’s all about the spin machines that we call the national news.

MSNBC, CNN and BBC are on fire for Obama. I won’t accuse the man of cheating on his wife, but a few cable stations’ mouths are firmly implanted on Barack’s you-know-what. And the same goes for “Fair and Balanced” FOX News and McCain. And the worst part? Both sides accuse each other of trying to fool the American public, when each political combatant has a major media outlet in the palm of his hand!

But what gets me the most is this — we slurp up the news stations’ milkshakes like they’re the tastiest thing on the planet. I just saw the video by Matt Damon (which is a bit slanted, but asks some good questions) over on The Superficial (which is a bit moronic and completely irrelevant to the real world, but crucial to my line of work), and the comments section was full of people who where A) spewing Dem rhetoric (which I hate. Rhetoric of all kinds is bad), B) McCain rhetoric (boo) or C) the “Who cares because I’m too cool for this thread” rhetoric (if you’re too good for this thread, then don’t take the time to post on it, wang). Not one clear, thought out, original thought in over 305 comments.

And that, my friends, is what this country’s politics have been reduced to. Spin-masters on everything from local radio to national TV. The candidates don’t matter. The parties don’t matter. Hell, they don’t even seem to be all that different. They like to spend my money and fight with the other side.

But you know who is different? Ron Paul. And that’s why I’m writing him in this November. I don’t care that he’s not running anymore. I don’t care that he’ll never win. I’m still going to do it, because I can’t stand the god damned major party bullshit any longer. Give me the guy who shows me how good he is through his voting record and not his mud-slinging, yellow-journalism-style TV spots.

Ron Paul 2008.

Long weekend’s over, suckers.

2 09 2008

Wait, I have to go back to work too? Shit. I guess I’m a sucker, too. Oh well. At least the weekend’s only four days away.

Thanks for the laugh, Natalie Dee.

Rejoice! Rejoice! Maximum Lazy now possible!

14 07 2008

If there’s one thing I know, it’s this: NetFlix NetRox. I really didn’t think there could ever be a better man-made creation than a monthly-fee-based mail-order movie rental service.

Then I saw the Roku box that streamed said movies right to my TV. “Touche, NetFlix,” I said. “Well played.” I was indeed thoroughly overjoyed by this new creation, and thought it to be the pinnacle of human innovation. In fact, once I had the money to flush down the shitter on unnecessary crap, I was to own one.

But, sadly, now Roku will never get their hands on my hard-earned dough. Why, you ask?

Lo and behold — NetFlix on XBOX 360. Coming this fall to a living room near you. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but blessed be Microsoft and the most heavenly game console/media server she has bestowed upon us.


Need proof that the miracle is actually happening? Check the pic. It’s the new XBOX 360 Dashboard (again, coming this fall) with a NetFlix queue on it. Thanks, Engadget.

My missile’s bigger than your missile

10 07 2008

As you may have heard, Iran held a missile test yesterday, which was made 100% more spectacular when they photoshopped a few extra missiles into official photos of the event. This is the chopped pic:

What you probably didn’t hear in the news is that I also held a missile test in my back yard. Personally, I think mine was better. Massive ogre baby FTW. And yes, as you may have gathered from the pink trail on the left missile, I fully support breast cancer. And by “fully support breast cancer”, I mean “boobies make me tingly in my no-no spot.”